Hey Pops, I feel like there’s nothing like a New Year for re-evaluation. And for some reason, whenever I take stock of where I am, I always beat myself up for falling short. So I take stock of where I am spiritually and I find that I’m way short of where I want to be. My prayer life is dry. My worship for you is silent. My time spent in other places.

Anyone ever felt forgotten by the Lord? Don’t worry, if you're sitting there with both hands and a foot in the air, I’m right there with you. And so was David. David felt forgotten by God. He felt like God had completely withdrawn from him; like no matter how long or loud he cried out for the Lord to hear him, he was still met with dead silence. David had been without God’s counsel for so long that he felt like he had to start turning to himself for answers, which only resulted in more sorrow in his heart.

Last week, I went to speak at the local university where I live. In the weeks leading up to that night, I was praying over what the Lord wanted me to say. These people attend a college chock-full of calculating minds and scientific brains, all ready to disprove God, faith, and the Bible. Some of them are exchange students, young adults that left their countries to experience America and are testing Christianity after childhoods spent in different religions. Some grew up across America, church kids through-and-through. They grew up in Sunday school and knew the Bible. Some were most likely skeptical and questioning. Even more were probably just going through the motions and trying to check a “God-box” to satisfy some idea of an obligation.

Hey Pops, I find myself longing for you more and more these days. I know what it feels like to be so close to your side, and I miss that. Like Mary, I’ve sat at your feet and listened carefully and hungrily to your every word. I know what it’s like to live so intimately with you, so when I start to run dry, I feel it harshly.

Have you ever come in contact with another Christian and thought: Wow, that person spends a LOT of time with Jesus? You know them, people that are practically dripping with the peace and the assuredness that comes with spending a lot of time in His presence. They give awesome advice, because their minds are so deeply rooted in scripture and their very thought process has transformed to be more like Jesus.

“Cortney, I don’t know how I can keep doing this. I just feel like nothing is happening.”“I don’t know what I’m doing wrong. Mostly, it seems like God forgot about me.”“I don’t know where God is, but every time I try to sit with Him, He’s silent.” These are variations of things I’ve been hearing a lot lately from my friends and confidants. And maybe I’m a broken record, but I feel like I’ve been saying the same thing in response to it all: Sit still with Jesus. Don’t say anything. Don’t do anything but be with Him.

Hey Pops, Thank you for being present in all seasons, even those seasons that my weak flesh struggles to seek and find you. Thank you for always beckoning me closer. Thank you for the distinct privilege of being called and claimed by you.

We cannot hide from God whatsoever. To some people, this is a beautiful thing, and to others, it’s a scary thing. To me and where I am in my walk now, it's so beautiful, but I understand from my own past experience why others would find it scary. God sees everything you do and everything you're going through before you even encounter it. He is at your right hand not to condemn you, but to guide you. When we aren’t doing the right things, we tend to view Him like a father who is going to be ashamed of us.