I prayed the sinner's prayer when I was about 10 years old, or at least, that’s the first time I remember praying it with a full realization of what I was doing and committing to. Before that, I was parroting along the words my teacher asked us to repeat during Sunday school “altar calls.” I went to the same church until I was 25. I sat under the same pastor, worshiped in the same building, and learned most of what I knew about the Bible in that church. I feel it’s very important to note: I love that church. I still have nothing but deep gratitude to the man that pastored that church while I was there and led a community where ultimately, I found a place of my own.

Last week we took a look at the story of Abraham’s test of faith in offering up his son to God as a sacrifice. We really combed through how Abraham’s faith had to be tested and strengthened to get to a place of blind faith and impossible obedience. But this week, I want to talk about Isaac and his own insane faith, because nowhere in the text does it say that Isaac cried out, let alone fought off or questioned his father. Everyone can take a look at Abraham and say, “Wow, his faith is amazing that he would give his only, beloved son to God like that.” But I don’t think Isaac gets enough recognition for the faith it would take in God to offer up our own life and trust that God would take care of it.

I was an only child until my brother came along. My memories of the days before he came along are limited, but I remember we lived on a busy street, so it made forming friendships with other kids on our block difficult because we couldn’t just go out and play. I remember asking my mom if she was going to have another baby so I could have a little sibling. A friend.

So now that we’ve seen how Jesus’ Kingdom-minded reaction with the fig tree was illustrated in the real-life cleansing of the Temple, let’s return back to the fig tree. In fact, scripture takes this same journey; it doesn’t leave any loose end open. After Jesus travelled to the temple and called out the manipulation that was allowed to take root in His Father’s house, they went back out of the city to where they were staying. The next morning, Jesus and His disciples travelled back to Jerusalem. Along the way, Peter and the disciples saw the same fig tree that enraged Jesus the day before. Except today, this tree no longer gave the appearance of a healthy plant. A mere 24 hours later, this same tree was not just leaf-less or fruit-less– the Bible says it was completely withered– it was dry, shriveled, and completely devoid of life.

It can be so difficult sometimes to trust in the Lord. In fact, it can be near impossible at times. Whether it be because you have no idea what He’s planning, or because everything around you seems to be going crazy. Whatever it is, we all have a moment where we are frustrated and doubtful. In fact, those moments seem to be quite frequent for me.

I struggled over whether or not I would speak on this. Between the memes, the news, the hysteria, and the somehow innate feeling that all people have to comment on current events– as if it changes much of anything– I feel that what I have to say is of little to no consequence compared to the ocean of content concerning COVID-19. Nevertheless, I am hearing some things from my fellow Christians that just don’t sit right with me, and although I know my thoughts are just a drop in the bucket, I do have to stand against the strange and unbiblical ideas that I see with a simple scroll through any of my social media outlets.

If you’ve been reading and following Soul Deep Devotions since the beginning, then you know my testimony: I’m the girl that’s always known Jesus. I never had this grand, tragic falling away story. Even in my college years, when I was in a sorority and wasn’t actively pursuing the Lord, I wasn’t that far away. My friends still saw me as a goodie-two-shoes. I didn’t do drugs, I didn’t go home with anyone for the night, and I always left the party before things got too crazy.

Trusting in the Lord is something I’m not quite sure we’re ever done learning, and the odds are, you don’t quite realize just how much you don’t trust in the Lord until someone points out how blatantly independent you are from the Lord. But this weekend, I was listening to someone else’s testimony about how the Lord used a season of poverty to teach him dependence on the Lord, and he said something that hit me right between the eyes.

Think back to a time as a child when you desperately wanted something from your parents. Possibly a toy, an outing, maybe a piece of candy from the checkout or an ice cream cone from the ice cream truck. Have it in mind? Did you promise anything to your parent at that moment? Possibly bribe them through good behavior or even the assurance of future good behavior? Think back on that moment, or any moment where you exchanged the promise of compliance for something you wanted from someone else. At that time, what do you think the motive behind your obedience was?

Have you ever been so overcome with fear that you felt paralyzed? Has your fear ever made you feel completely incompetent and of no value? Has the power of fear ever whispered multiple lies into your heart, which you begin to believe as truth? One little fear in our hearts can ripple into an insecurity, then into an overwhelming thought, and then soon a lie that begins to hold truth over our lives leaving us feeling unworthy– even more than that– not ourselves.

Maybe it’s a little cliché, but I think this passage of the Christmas story is my favorite. Whenever I read it, I can’t help but feel such wonder for the moment. Mary, a young Nazarene girl goes from unseen and simple to the living proof of God’s amazing power and love.

Have you ever received a word you knew was straight from God? And I’m not talking about kinda, sorta, maybe. I’m talking about a promise so without a doubt that it had to have come straight from the mouth of Jesus. I received a word like that earlier this year. I came from a very close friend who was praying over me during a worship night. As she prayed, she became thoughtfully silent, and then looked at me and said, “I don’t know why Jesus wants me to say this. I don’t really know where it’s coming from either, but He wants you to know that your heart will never be broken again.”

It’s such a simple thought, but just ponder it: faith is the heart and soul of our relationship with God. It is the igniter that brought us to the cross and moved us to commit to Him. It is the lens through which we see the world and the litmus test we use to turn conviction into life-change. It is a tool we use to search our hearts and the baton we must be desperate to pass on to as many people as we can possibly manage.