Christmas: Staying Faithful to the Word Despite Impossibility

 “Oh, how my soul praises the Lord. How my spirit rejoices in God my Savior! For he took notice of his lowly servant girl, and from now on all generations will call me blessed. For the Mighty One is holy and he has done great things for me. He shows mercy from generation to generation to all who fear him.” (Luke 1:46-50, NLT)

If you’ve been reading and following Soul Deep Devotions since the beginning, then you know my testimony: I’m the girl that’s always known Jesus. I never had this grand, tragic falling away story. Even in my college years, when I was in a sorority and wasn’t actively pursuing the Lord, I wasn’t that far away. My friends still saw me as a goodie-two-shoes. I didn’t do drugs, I didn’t go home with anyone for the night, and I always left the party before things got too crazy. 

Even in those seasons where I wasn’t sold out and on fire, I still prayed. I still worshipped. I still went to church, and I still had a relationship with the Lord. I was always a God-girl, even when I was trying to play that part of myself down.

And because that part of me has always been ingrained into my identity, compounded with the fact that I grew up knowing Jesus and therefore nothing about the spiritual ever scared me, I started hearing from the Lord at a very young age. I stepped out at a very young age and became comfortable sharing words from the Lord that I got or walking in the way I felt He was leading.

It was always as easy as breathing, until this year.

This year, I learned a very valuable lesson in walking in obedience to Jesus, even when those around you are doubtful that you’re hearing from Jesus at all. And you know what? It was probably one of the most challenging seasons I’ve ever had.

I tried to follow it, but when people around me started to question what I felt so sure about in my heart, I began to doubt in what I had heard. Soon, I started to fight within my heart as to whether or not what I heard was my flesh. Eventually, I ran in the opposite direction, and that ended up hurting not only myself, but my family and those I hold the closest. 

I did the exact opposite of what Mary did; because if I really think about it, sure, what Jesus told me to step into was crazy, but probably just about as crazy as carrying and mothering a child that had no earthly father.

Mary was asked to become pregnant with the Son of God. She was young, unmarried, unprepared, and unprotected. The word the Lord gave her meant she might have to sacrifice her fiance, any semblance of a normal life, and her comfortability. Still, she said yes, because she trusted God’s ability to protect her and not forsake her, even when all the odds were stacked against her. 

She said yes, but she didn’t start to doubt or question; even when Joseph turned against her. Even when she had to drop everything she had going on to go live with her cousin for the first 3 months of pregnancy before Joseph got on board. She didn’t hide or cower, even though the customs at that time could have threatened her life and well-being for being found as pregnant outside of marriage. 

God asked Mary to be crazy, and she didn’t huff and puff about how hard it would be to remain faithful to the Lord’s plan. She didn’t turn and run. Instead, she praised the Lord for the impossibility of the situation. She exhorted Him for His mercy and His faithfulness. She leaned back on the fact that God carried her through her whole life thus far, and leaned into the fact that He wouldn’t leave her now. 

And the Lord is steadfast. He is the same today as He was to Mary generations ago. He is the same God that kept her safe and blessed her for stewarding His word and His will from promise to baby, and from baby to Savior. 

And maybe I’m not perfect. Maybe my situation was different, but still just as crazy. And you know what? I know I didn’t react the same, but if you find yourself in the same situation– if the Lord has spoken to you and you gave up on it because it didn’t feel like your support system didn’t back you up– then know it’s not too late today. Even if you’ve been running for decades, or just a day, you can still turn back and lean in. You can still stop and say yes again. 

Because when my situation gets hard and my doubt starts to creep back in, sometimes I have to turn around and say yes again. Sometimes I have to remember that the voice that told me to do something crazy was the same voice that whispered to me since I was a little girl. 

You might not have a soul in this world that wants to support that word, but the Lord is faithful and He is true to His word. His hand is still extended. He is just waiting for you to stop, lean in, and praise Him in the heart of your impossible moment.