The Israelites ate manna for all forty years they wandered in the wilderness. For a younger generation of Israelites, that was for all their lives. Think about that: Every day, for forty years, everyone would go out at the break of dawn and sweep up manna. And even though manna is known as “bread from heaven,” it didn’t drop down from the sky in loaves. Angels didn’t deliver it to the entrances of each tent wrapped in a tea towel and warm from God’s heavenly oven. No, every morning, Israel would wake up, head outside, and sweep up the manna– it materialized in the morning dew and as the sun rose, the water would evaporate off and leave behind a small seed the size of coriander or a mustard seed. Because it was so small and fine, most people swept it up rather than gathering it piece by piece; which they had to do early in the morning, because as the sun rose later in the day, that manna would also melt away.

Up until this point, we’ve gone through a lot of false gospels that run rampant in the charismatic or modern-day church, but we haven’t talked about the ways that traditional, old-school church can lead people astray from true, God-glorifying faith. Because the traditional church was so popular 50-60 years ago, chances are, you’ve been to at least one service and know what I’m talking about.

In 2019, I left the church I attended my whole life. As a child, teenager, and young adult, it was a wonderful place to learn about and develop a relationship with God. The leadership was amenable to allowing youth to serve and be heard, and in turn, that made me and my friends excited to be a part of that body of believers for many, many years. But at the age of 25, I felt the Lord leading me into a new direction. In a lot of ways, that transition out of everything I knew was scary. I was comfortable in that church and it had a large hand in shaping me into who I was. I loved my pastor and the community that I’d trusted and gotten so used to. But once I left, I realized that up until that point, I didn’t really know my Bible. I had taken everything that was preached from the pulpit as gospel. And that’s not to say that my pastor was a false teacher or anything, but it is to say that I never really tested the full measure of scripture for myself, asking the Holy Spirit to reveal Himself in the Word to me on a personal level.

You’re probably tired of hearing from me at this point, but it’s a concept we need to constantly be reminded of: The Bible is the only thing we need in order to understand God. Are commentaries helpful? Yes. Are there teachers out there that are helpful in taking scripture, unpacking it, and explaining it to us? Yes. What’s the problem with that? You can’t always trust people to be right in exegeting scripture, and you certainly can’t depend on a person to reveal the heart of God.

Hey Pops, It’s been weighing on my heart that I’m not necessarily the best “evangelist” of your gospel. Sure, I post devotions, I serve at church, and I try to live my life to glorify you, but I think I mostly fall short. Am I quick to share your Word with my friends? With my family? And not just the synopsis that the world already knows: That you were born, died on the cross for our sins, and rose from the grave to save us. I’m talking about something deeper, more mature. Do I encourage my friends and family to seek out the true Gospel?

If you’ve been with me since the beginning of this ministry, you’ll know we’ve been doing this for a while. In fact, this August will be the 5 year anniversary of Soul Deep’s launch. Over the years, we’ve been reading and studying together every week– there was a time where we used to post twice a week, too!– which means we’ve gotten together like this through the internet somewhere around 250 times, give or take. You’ll remember that there have been other voices that have shared what God was saying to them, but mine has probably been the most consistent. In fact, consistency is one of my disciplines– maybe at some times, to my detriment– because there have been many times where I’ll be watching TV on a Monday night and say, “I have to write a devo for tomorrow!” or , “I don’t have any ideas of what to post tomorrow.” To which my husband might say, “So take a break. You don’t have to force it. Give it a few days to see if something convicts you enough to write.”But I’m a very strong-willed person, and letting you all wake up on Tuesday morning, excited to read and connect over God's Word only to find an empty inbox, is not something I can easily accept.

I am not one of those people that titles their year with a word every January. Don’t get that confused with being a words girl, which I am to the core. I’m just not that type of person who announces to the world every year that I am going to study, meditate on, and learn to embody one word throughout the year. Lots of people do this, and I always find it really interesting to see where people are in their own personal walks every year; choosing words like “vision,” “courage,” “steadfastness,” the list goes on.

The Gospel of John starts out differently than all the other gospels. Instead of going through the lineage of Jesus, a prophecy fulfilled, or the re-telling of His birth, John chooses to start at the beginning. No, not the beginning of Jesus’ life. The very beginning of creation, before time began itself. In five short verses, John is able to package and communicate a picture of the supremely vast and awesome fact that Jesus is sovereignly God. Using the Word, light, and life as analogies, John reinforces the existence of the Trinity, God as an uncreated Creator of all, and the pre-eminence of the Savior He is.

I prayed the sinner's prayer when I was about 10 years old, or at least, that’s the first time I remember praying it with a full realization of what I was doing and committing to. Before that, I was parroting along the words my teacher asked us to repeat during Sunday school “altar calls.” I went to the same church until I was 25. I sat under the same pastor, worshiped in the same building, and learned most of what I knew about the Bible in that church. I feel it’s very important to note: I love that church. I still have nothing but deep gratitude to the man that pastored that church while I was there and led a community where ultimately, I found a place of my own.

Words are important. More than anything, they are our legacy. They have the power to affect those around us and the ability to outlive us and be remembered long after we’re gone. This weekend, my whole family was in town visiting. My grandmother made a craft for the ladies to do before we went to a high tea luncheon and asked me to create a devotion to go along with it.

If you’ve been reading and following Soul Deep Devotions since the beginning, then you know my testimony: I’m the girl that’s always known Jesus. I never had this grand, tragic falling away story. Even in my college years, when I was in a sorority and wasn’t actively pursuing the Lord, I wasn’t that far away. My friends still saw me as a goodie-two-shoes. I didn’t do drugs, I didn’t go home with anyone for the night, and I always left the party before things got too crazy.