On July 11, 2024, Lily Anne Wente was born at 11:29 a.m. She weighed 8 lbs 2 oz and measures 21.5 inches long.

Exactly one year ago, my little family found itself in a moment of crisis. Sam’s job came to an end at the church in North Carolina. For months, he was scouring job boards looking for a new pastoral job while delivering pizzas to help supplement our income. Church job searches are a long, drawn out process, and most require you to appear at the church and guest preach so the congregation can meet you, your family, and get an idea of how you would shepherd the church.

Isn’t it funny how following Jesus keeps you on your toes? In my years of knowing Him and walking with Him, my personal testimony is that He has never brought me to places I expected Him to. When I look back at my whole life– born and raised on Long Island, sent to the mission field in South Africa, moving as a newlywed to coastal North Carolina, and most recently, transplanted clear across the country to the mountains of Oregon– there are twists and turns God has set in motion that I could never have anticipated or foresaw myself going in His name.

Could you imagine being Zecharias? He encountered an angel in the temple that told him he was going to be a father in his old age. His first reaction was doubt and he lost his voice as a result. This rendered him a mute for the entirety of his wife’s pregnancy; and as he watched the evidence of this miracle grow within his wife– the very proof he asked the angel for when he found out about his son– he was unable to rejoice in it with his words. During Elizabeth’s delivery, Zecharias could not offer her words of comfort or encouragement. In the first days of John’s life, Zecharias watched God’s marvelous plan unfolding in real time, in the midst of it and yet somehow sidelined at the same time.

This week, I met a new friend for dinner. While praying to bless the food, I said something along the lines of, “Lord, give us the courage to walk in your will.” When I finished, she asked me what I meant by asking for the courage to walk with the Lord. And I sort of paused, because it’s something I have been asking God a lot lately in my personal prayers. Have you ever been praying to God for something, and in your own mind the path from A to B is obvious? Have you ever mistaken that easy, obvious path as God’s will? Or maybe God closed the door on that route and left you feeling confused. Why would God tease us with something that seemed like an answer to prayer, only for it to pass right over us?

In 2014, back in the days before this website existed, God laid it on my heart to go on a mission trip to Africa. At the onset, I thought the obvious path was to go with a family friend that had an organization in Tanzania. That mission would consist of traveling in the African bush, visiting tribes and ministering to them over the course of about two or three weeks. There were months of planning, between figuring out what vaccines I’d need, supplies, putting my finances in order to fund it, and travel logistics. Finally, it came time to buy the plane tickets and try as I did, confirming a booking proved impossible. I’d have the tickets, pick my seat, enter my payment information, and submit, but for some reason each time I tried, the seat was no longer available. This happened several times with multiple airlines before my mom stepped in and voiced my own concern: Something wasn’t right.

On September 2nd, 2022, Piper was born at 11:33 pm at 7 lbs 5 oz, 21 inches long. After all that time waiting, and at 41 weeks, 5 days, every plan Sam and I made about how we wanted our daughter to be born went out the window. We wanted a home birth with the midwife we'd been meeting with over the course of my pregnancy.

You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies. It’s such a short sentence, but it is a powerful picture of the Christian walk. I’m sure you’ve been there, because we all have. We all have enemies. And sometimes, our enemy isn’t a person. Sometimes our enemy is something completely unseen that tucks itself up to the table and stares us down, waiting for us to blink. Depression. Anxiety. Fear. Unemployment. Infertility. Disappointment. Lost dreams. Low self esteem and body issues. Grief. Intimidation. Disease. The list can go on and on.

Have you ever been in a place where you honestly believed your sin discounted you from serving God or made you unworthy of salvation? I’m sure we’ve all been there. We’ve all grappled with our worthiness of God’s goodness from deep within the sin that separates us and Him. You think what you did was bad, but have you ever been a lying, deceitful prostitute? We find one in the pages of the book of Joshua; Rahab, a prostitute living in the city of Jericho– yes, THAT Jericho– a city that was one of the biggest bosses that Israel had to defeat before reclaiming the land promised to them by God.

I’ve probably said this before, but Ruth is one of my favorite books in the Bible. Some people disagree. I’ve heard some people pull out some really questionable theology out of this book and completely twist it completely out of context. The truth is, at its heart, the Book of Ruth is a beautiful metaphor of God’s redemptive plan and one woman’s resilience and tenacity.

Tons of people are remembered in the Bible. Some for their bravery, some for their deep faith in God; some for their mistakes, and others for their quick wits. And although the men tend to catch biblical legacy for longer stretches of scripture, there are still countless tales of women that should be remembered for their tenacity to honor God above all else and further His kingdom, even if their stories are brief.

Last week we took a look at the story of Abraham’s test of faith in offering up his son to God as a sacrifice. We really combed through how Abraham’s faith had to be tested and strengthened to get to a place of blind faith and impossible obedience. But this week, I want to talk about Isaac and his own insane faith, because nowhere in the text does it say that Isaac cried out, let alone fought off or questioned his father. Everyone can take a look at Abraham and say, “Wow, his faith is amazing that he would give his only, beloved son to God like that.” But I don’t think Isaac gets enough recognition for the faith it would take in God to offer up our own life and trust that God would take care of it.

It can be so difficult sometimes to trust in the Lord. In fact, it can be near impossible at times. Whether it be because you have no idea what He’s planning, or because everything around you seems to be going crazy. Whatever it is, we all have a moment where we are frustrated and doubtful. In fact, those moments seem to be quite frequent for me.

I wrote those words in the middle of winter, while sitting at my desk in small-town Potsdam, New York. Three months later, as I re-read my old, unedited words, I sat back and thought about how much my life had been flipped upside down. Later that night, I had received an email, saying that I would have three days to get rid of all of my belongings, and move out of my college dorm to live with my parents on Long Island again. I was crushed, especially after writing such strong, comforting words earlier that morning.

Do you ever forget who you are? Before you know it minutes turn into hours, hours into days, and days into weeks, causing you to lose sight of your identity, and purpose, through Jesus Christ. That is a place that many of us have passed through before. You may also be someone who feels that you've never known who you are. You have just been wondering since you have been able to wonder. Maybe you have never found the “right” answer or the answer that gave you the most purpose. I feel that I can confidently say that most likely almost everyone has been in that place of wondering, and if you are a follower of the Lord than you have most likely forgotten even if it has been minutes rather than weeks.

n this season, we celebrate Jesus, our Savior being born in a manger in Bethlehem. Our God needed to come to this world to save us– His people– and He decided to come in the form of a baby through the virgin Mary. In this season of family and holiday excitement, it can be very easy to forget what we are truly celebrating and that is one of the most beautiful of miracles the world has ever seen.

Trusting in the Lord is something I’m not quite sure we’re ever done learning, and the odds are, you don’t quite realize just how much you don’t trust in the Lord until someone points out how blatantly independent you are from the Lord. But this weekend, I was listening to someone else’s testimony about how the Lord used a season of poverty to teach him dependence on the Lord, and he said something that hit me right between the eyes.