Modern Psalms: Help me Give Myself Over to you Daily

“I will extol the Lord at all times; his praise will always be on my lips. I will glory in the Lord; let the afflicted hear and rejoice. Glorify the Lord with me; let us exalt his name together. I sought the Lord, and he answered me; he delivered me from all my fears. Those who look to him are radiant; their faces are never covered with shame.” (Psalm 34: 1-5, NIV)

Hey Pops,

It almost seems unreal that it could be 2022. Somehow, as a child, you think about what being grown will be like, but it’s hard to actually realize it. It’s almost like we take things for granted, whether it be our youth or being blessed enough to live long enough to step into the unknowns of life.

There’s something about a new year that feels like standing on the edge of a pool. There’s no doubt that you will plunge in, but when? How? Once you’ve committed to a plunge, gravity takes over and there is no going back.

So, here we are: at the beginning. On the edge, knowing that the future is quickly becoming the present and then the past. Knowing that this moment is so fleeting and that stepping off into what comes next is an inevitability, and when I yield, there is no regaining control.

So now, Lord, at the beginning of this year, I want to make the decision to give myself over to you and the will you have for my life. Let your Holy Spirit be the gravity, the guide, and the safe landing. I want my life to be rooted in your scriptures. Help me to see deeper things in your word this year, and help me not only to be bold enough to share those things with others, but grant me the gift of communicating them well.

Help me to live a life of worship this year, with your praise always on my lips. Help me to live a life in glory to you, so that it is apparent to those around me that you are at the center of my heart, my family, and my marriage. Let my life be a living monument to your goodness and your power. When others see me, let them be inspired to glorify you with me. I don’t want to be a Christian that just goes through life and never shines your Word out to others. 

When people see me, let them see Jesus, and let that move them to draw closer to you. Help me to know your word, to be it, and to be the kind of Christian that moves others to know you deeper. Not just for social media, or for self-preservation, or to impress, or to check a religious expectation set by man. I want my faith to be strong and delightful to you.

Because you have carried me every day of my life. As a small child, you gave me parents and teachers that helped to hide you in my heart. They taught me who you are and what you did. As a teenager, you kept me close, even in my rebellion while I was testing the water myself and taking control into my own hands. You kept me close to your heart, even when I turned away from it and wanted to see the world for myself. You called me back and welcomed me home. As a young adult, you revealed yourself to me more intimately than I knew you before. From that moment, the God I knew growing up became more than a foundation or a background character. Your fingerprints on my life are evidence of your deep mercies to me since the beginning. You beckoned me deeper and I continue to follow as far as you’re willing to reveal yourself to me.

As an adult, I know you are with me, through more than just my easy days. You are there in my darkest nights and deepest heartaches. You always have been. There is not a place in this universe that I am unreachable to you. My enemies have become a little more abstract and intangible, but you are mighty over it all. 

Lord, you’re beautiful. You are the only one I grip to all the days of my life. I may have moments of fear over what might come, but you always remind me that you are there. Thank you for every blessing you have provided over the course of 2021: a deeper relationship with my wonderful and patient husband, our very first home, getting to see him work as a pastor as his partner, and our feisty, lovable pup. 

These are earthly riches I don’t deserve, yet you have freely given. Help me to steward them righteously and to prepare my heart for what comes next. You are all I need, and I lean on you through whatever comes.

I want to start this year right, by re-establishing you as King over my heart. I want to live this year– and every year– in worship to you. Let my heart be pure. Let my mind meditate on your word and let my hands be an extension of yours.

My only reward is to bring glory to you and your Kingdom. Thank you for being a faithful Father, a steadfast friend, and a loving God. 

Love you,

Cortney