The Unchanging God in Seasons of Change

“I love you, Lord, my strength. The Lord is my rock, my fortress and my deliverer; my God is my rock, in whom I take refuge,  my shield and the horn of my salvation, my stronghold.” (Psalm 18:1-2, NIV)

I don’t think I’ve ever walked through a season of life where so much change was happening all at once. Not even when I was married, although there was a lot of change in that season as well.

And I know, I have a decent amount of readers that don’t have kids and are probably tired of hearing me talk about being pregnant, but I can’t help it. It’s just where I am right now. Having your first child is a life-change like no other. Simultaneously, you’re growing a baby in an area that only you have occupied all your life. Every day, it seems like there are new changes, new aches, pains, growth, symptoms, and all the while, this child is reminding you that they are growing out of what once was next to nothing.

Your body grows. Possibly the only time in a woman’s life where having this big, heavy belly is normal, and yet you still look at yourself in the mirror– especially at this late stage– and see a body you’re not used to. And before you all start writing in like you always do, I get it. My body is currently doing the most beautiful thing it could ever do right now, and bodies change constantly. I’m not down on myself, I’m just saying that there are moments where that kind of transition is hard to be in the moment with.

You adjust to this idea that you’re about to become something you’ve never been before: mother. Parent. A change that is scary and wonderful at the same time. You hope and pray that you have the wisdom to raise a person that is good, smart, self-aware, and well-rounded. You know you will never be perfect, but you want to put every drop of yourself into the challenge. It’s probably the most important role you’ll ever step into, and without a doubt, it affects other people– namely your child. And yet, it’s a beautiful transition you hopefully get to experience with your partner, leaning on each other to tackle it together.

And while those emotional and philosophical changes are happening, the physical changes even faster. You clear a room of your home out and fill it with things for the baby. You baby-proof your house. You rearrange your decor and cabinets and closets to make room for a brand new person.

It’s the life-change to end all life-changes– at least in my experience so far. There are moments that overwhelm me. There are moments where I’m emotional (thank you, hormones) and there are others where I’m so stinkin’ excited I can hardly stand waiting for the moment I get to hold my daughter for the first time. Without a doubt, the past 9 months have been a crazy period of constant preparation for something that is so unknown, it’s hard to prepare for.

But if there’s anything I know, it’s that when life goes through big changes, the best thing I can do is lean into an unchanging God. Why? Because in every major life-change I’ve gone through, there has been one common denominator: the fact that Jesus went through it with me and was always there to depend on.

I love the Psalm our key verse comes from. It helps me remember that God is always there, rescuing me, protecting me, strengthening me, teaching me, and showing His love for me along the way. It reminds me that in every season, He is so worthy of my praise and adoration. Even in those seasons that seemed so dark to me– in my grief, my worry, or my fear, God was always there with me.

And maybe it’s a basic truth to write devotions on. Maybe I write about this a lot. But I know I need to be reminded a lot, and I know that for my own personal faith, it’s important for me to make time to reflect on it. If there’s anything I can teach my daughter or model with my life, it’s that the best thing you can do is depend on God. The most valuable action is to turn to Him and remember the great lengths He has gone to in the name of love.

The Lord is my strength and it’s one of the many reasons I can’t help but love Him for. Because when I am challenged by the changes my body is going through and the fact that I don’t look the way I’m used to, I can turn to Him and be reminded that I am beautifully and wonderfully made in all seasons of my life. I can be reminded that God created me as a woman and made it possible for my body to be an environment that sustains life. When I am faced with a new, unknown chapter, I am comforted by the fact that God made a way for me to be a mother where I couldn’t make a way for myself. I can lean on the fact that He knew where I’d be before I ever did, and He still knows where I am yet to go. I can find peace in the fact that He will continue to be there and keep working things together for His good, even when I fall vastly short of getting it right.

And yes, God is my refuge when my home feels upside down. He is sitting beside me as Sam and  I clear a space for my daughter to occupy, just like He already made a space for the two of us. He helps me to let go of things exactly how I like it in order for me to walk into this life-change equipped to handle it. And again, He fills in my gaps. He sees it all, knows it all, and will continue to be God in every moment, big and small.

Maybe your life-change is different than mine today. Maybe you’re getting ready to go off to college, nervous to make new friends, study new things, and find your way in a new place. Maybe you’re a parent getting ready to send your kids off– to school, a career, a marriage– learning the art of letting go and becoming a parent in a different capacity. Maybe you’re starting a new job, or moving to a new place, or planning to start a business… whatever it is you’re getting ready to change, it’s okay to be nervous. It’s okay to be unsure.

And when we do feel nervous, or unsure, or even excited, it’s important for us to remember that God goes with us. He is our strength to face change. He is our refuge, our stronghold, our solid ground, and our shield. It is important for us to always remember and lean on Him, allowing Him to lead us and transform us and be Lord over our lives. 

God I Look To You (Lyric Video) - Francesca Battistelli