When I was a little girl, one of my favorite places to go was the library. Whenever I’d go, I’d always leave with a stack of books as long as my arms. My dad used to yell at me, saying, “You’re never going to read all those books in two weeks before you need to return them! Pare it down!” My mom would laugh and shake her head, knowing full well I’d gobble every book up. A few months ago, I remembered this part of my childhood and realized: Somewhere along the way, I got too busy to read.

This quarantine has added a lot more free time to most people’s daily life. Many have used it to start Tik-Tok accounts, start a new Netflix series, or maybe some have even learned how to cook. Whatever the case may be for you, you’ve probably added more ‘self-care’ into your routine. Whether it be taking luxurious baths, trying out new skincare products, or reading books that you’ve had on your shelf for months just waiting to be cracked open; you have probably been focusing on caring for yourself as much as possible during this uncertain time. While all of those things are great– and probably extremely necessary for your mental health right now– there’s one thing that I just want to encourage you guys in today: spiritual self-care.

You can be honest: Did you actually read today’s key verse, or did your eyes glaze over once you realized it was familiar? I know I do it. If I have a verse memorized, I don’t tend to read it when I recognize it. My mind automatically goes on airplane mode, thinking, “Oh, I know that. Let’s skip past this part.” Because my time is so valuable, I can’t even read a verse that I’ve become so obviously numb to, right? Because I’m so busy, I can’t reconnect with a precious scripture that is something I desperately need to hear, right?

I like to think of myself as a problem solver. When I see something that’s not working, I get in there, try and figure out the best possible solution, and make things happen as best I can to correct the issue. Many times, because it’s a part of my personality to constantly try and think up creative projects to get into, I often find myself as the girl holding a lot of the information and coordinating a lot of people.

I think as Christians, we sometimes feel this constant pressure of having to be perfect. We set these unrealistic expectations for ourselves of having to always be joyful and thankful and thriving in our walks with the Lord, yet the reality is, it’s not always like that. We come to the point of fearing struggle and hate to admit when we are facing it.

I am sitting down writing this devotional in Starbucks with a grande coffee next to me and an overwhelming to-do list bouncing around in my brain. Yet, in the midst of all my unchecked tasks, my mind longs for is some much-needed rest. If you know me you know I love my sleep, so when I say I am longing for “rest,” I am talking about 12 hours of deep sleep. I have gotten to the point in my life where I am used to the fast pace world we live in, and I can tell you honestly, I am not a fan. It feels as if is there not enough silence to rest and hear the Lord.